Maiden Mother Crone - A Twelve Month Series

Maiden Mother Crone

My Best Friend Cam

Maiden - June '17


Cam Plainy always had something snarky to say.
We were in third grade and Girl Scouts. I remember the night our troop visited the local doughnut shop. I was not happy about the doughnut holes on a stick that the owner was giving us. I mumbled something rude. He looked at me, his mouth went curly on the sides. Then he gave me a whole doughnut decorated with colorful frostings. Those girls looked at me weird. I didn’t care, Cam said, “They’re just jealous.” After that, Cam became my best friend.

We had a great time especially in high school! And we stayed close through our thirties. I still liked to gripe and always loved a good snide remark. But, I spent less time with Cam. When my son was born, I met another friend, Joy. We still hang-out almost every day. I had decided Cam and I didn’t have as much in common; I’d appreciate her from a distance.

Joy is great, but, in the next years, life had some big challenges. I met Death, a nightmare. I despised him. He took my partner and I was alone. Joy couldn’t console me. So my old friend, Cam, came to my rescue. I was seriously angry. She introduced me to Judge B. Hateful and Rea Sentment. We banded together and drank Chardonnay, smoked cigarettes, cried, screamed, and cursed as I trudged through the days. Then one day, this chick, named Sophia, said something at a goddess circle. I still didn’t fully get what or who a goddess was. Anyway, she asked me if I was ready to do the work.

The work? What work is she talking about? Cam, Rea and the Judge didn’t even want to stay around to hear more. I was alone listening to Sophia suggest that if I wanted to stop being so angry, I’d have to do something about it.

Cam said, “Are you crazy? You’re working full time; you are a single mother, and you’re in grad school. When the hell are you supposed to do this ‘work?’” I agreed, I had no time for more work. The judge said, “You have every right to hold onto your hatred, it’s yours, you’ve earned it!” Rea said, “Fuck this “work” idea, how absurd! You are the victim here!” They understood me, and I liked the feeling of having them around. At least they weren’t going anywhere. I didn’t want Sophia and this “work” to threaten our relationship.

However, Joy saw things differently. She liked the idea, and pushed me to meet with Sophia over coffee. I was reticent, but, I went. Sophia explained that her name means wisdom. I thought that was cool. Eventually, I said yes to the “work”, the wisdom-work. Rarely looking back, but when I do, I see Cam, standing with the judge and Rea in the distance waving and blowing kisses – wild! It’s like Cam wanted me to get with Sophia all along. Well, honesty never was her thing.

Sacred Body Intelligence

Sacred Body Intelligence

“Through our eyes, the Universe perceives itself.”
Alan Watts

The Five Senses

Alan Watts describes the ways in which we perceive things. He says all the 5 senses are essentially feeling. We feel the sound waves in the inner workings of our ears. Our eyes feel light and perceive sight. We feel the tongue’s nerve endings as reaction to food particles and call that taste. Closely related to the sense of taste is what the tiny receptors feel inside the nose, and we call that smell. Finally, we have the sense of touch, in which our body’s nervous system is designed to feel different sensations on the skin. He also recognizes the perfection in that these senses are all integrated. We can see, smell, and touch a crying baby; we see, smell and sense the heat, and taste of a hot chocolate.

We know it is healthy to touch and be touched, Maslow showed us that with rhesus monkeys. We know it is awesome to see the beauty of a flower, (or a 3D IMAX). If we have the gift of hearing, we hear voices and music. We love to taste; it is the great joy of many a foodie, and aficionado of wine. It is a sensual bliss of humanness when those five senses are felt and enjoyed.


We know how to feel. And yet, aside from the senses that we have assigned labels to, we do not think we are feeling our way thorough life. We do this because we are living from the neck up, thinking. From Pre-K and on, we develop and refine thinking skills. Those first few years in school are a pounding of discipline in rote memorization. Most cultures give it full attention because thinking one’s way through life reflects the Newtonian age, the Age of Enlightenment, the Rational Age. We know how to practice and develop skills, mental acumen, and intelligence.

Sometimes people get so caught up in thinking, they think circles around themselves, overthink, think they must learn, learn more, and achieve by learning. Academia, trains us how to learn. Matthew Fox says one of the greatest weapons a person can wield is a Ph.D. when the one with the doctorate doesn’t know how to feel; in fact, how to dance with his or her feelings, how to ride out the wildness and unpredictability of them. It is possible to attune to feelings, however it is not taught, and emphasized. Actually, I think the awareness of its importance is simply not there. Instead we place our awareness on rational thinking alone.

With all that thinking, there is a whole lot of chatter going on. When this happens we call it “The Monkey Mind.” No offense to the monkeys, however, if spinning stories, scenarios, reliving events, overanalyzing, and over-thinking such things as personal, human situations, and circumstances is happening. This is when we must say, “STOP!” and get quiet.


Quieting the mind can be scary though. Calming, breathing, and relaxing the thinking mind has significance, power, and value and it is so underestimated. When we overthink, meditation can give pause to thinking. It can relax the monkey mind. It is the key to giving the nervous system a break, reset, and rejuvenation. Inner listening requires getting quiet. Getting quiet, really going inward can be so delicious. It is getting to know the deepest part of oneself.

It is the inner sanctum, and it is the safest, richest, and most connected place. It is so beautiful when a person learns to become One with the inner self. Hanging out in divine connection is where this can lead. It is nothing short of Bliss. It can be completely inspirational.

It is the time and space for allowing all those ideas to flow and yet it is different from thinking. It simply is allowing for the insights and brilliance to surface as if they are already there in the ethers, in the consciousness of the I AM.


We know we feel, and we focus and attend to our thinking capacities. We also know that it is really a great idea to relax and meditate sometimes.

What are we really in the practice of doing though? I think what we are really doing culturally is checking out. When we know it is time to relax that thinking mind, we distract with sports, with a movie, with the news, with pop culture and we integrate it into our intellect of course, where else? Even in our downtime from the pressure of activating our intelligence at work or school we are activating our thinking mind. Then when we become bored or uninterested at work, we check there.

We might daydream of another possibility for a job or focus of study. What we are doing just doesn’t feel right anymore. Maybe it happens in the relationships we keep. We might be in a relationship and that doesn’t feel right anymore. And that thinking mind is spinning in monkey thought with great attention as if nothing else exists. It is spinning and spinning, trying to understand and make sense of the feeling. That feeling might be listened to or it may be suppressed, and dismissed. When that is ignored, that feeling might become an ulcer or a heart attack, or pneumonia. And then we listen because our physical body demands the attention.

So we finally give it. Waiting until physical ailment sets in, how intelligent is that?

Body Language

When our consciousness is speaking to us, the information is received in the body, not necessarily in our thinking minds. Body Language is what our body is “saying” to us. The language of the body speaks to us in feeling tone. What is feeling tone? It is the resonance that different energetics vibrate. For example, anger vibrates at a different frequency than joy, for example, and we may feel these in the gut or heart or throat. We understand this; yet, in our current culture we don’t give it much importance. As I alluded earlier, we may be good at burying the feeling, ignoring its existence.

According to Eastern traditions we have 7 chakras. These 7 chakras are energy centers in the body and they give a great map of the areas of importance. Since we live in our thinking, mind we rarely focus any attention on the other six energy centers of the body. If you ask me, it is not very intelligent to ignore them.

Cut to the Chase

We are more than our 5 senses; we are more than our thinking minds. We can choose to listen to all 7 major energy centers in the body, our sacred vessel. Then we can integrate just like the five senses are integrated. When listening to the tonal vibrations our body is FEELING within our body’s energy centers we understand the most grounded information. This is KNOWING. And inner knowing is synonymous with faith, and flavored with wisdom. Once we develop this practice we recognize our body intelligence is very accurate and powerful. And this is because it is aligned with the sacredness of the Universe and the Principles and Laws that orchestrate it.

It must BE because we are not separate from the Universe and how it flows. This knowing comes from within, call it intuition, premonition, instinct, a “download” etc. It is for real. No one is exempt; it is available for every one of us and our awareness of it can be developed like exercising a muscle or delving into an area of study, like medicine or an art. One does not have to be psychic or have “special abilities”. There is no magic happening. It is all very grounded in reality, the reality of Universal Principles and Universal Laws. Body Language is seeing with the eyes of the soul, hearing with the inner ear and feeling with the wisdom of all there IS. When we awaken to feeling and integrating, we are the Universe experiencing itself.

The good news is that more and more of us are listening to our bodies. We are becoming aware and are looking to develop the intelligence of the body. The even greater news is that it can be learned, and developed by way of practice. We can practice this daily until one day we don’t need to think about it anymore and it just happens naturally. After having developed this acumen, others can be lead or taught to have these sensitivities, or at least the setting can be created and encouraged for people to deepen this way, just like it was in the ancient mystery schools.

The Divine Feminine

The Divine Feminine

The Divine Feminine is really not a new idea; it is not a goddess movement or a hippie cult religion. It is not synonymous with Feminism. It is not just a pagan mythical-mystical concept. It does not denote polytheism. It is not some new-agey idea just being hatched. It has always been there. It is ancient; it is wisdom and mystery, and it is Divine. We are collectively remembering the Divine Feminine, yet most still have amnesia. The Divine Feminine is the feminine aspect of God. Therefore, it is expressed as Goddess. Imagine the perfect balance of the Yin Yang symbol: The Divine Feminine is one of the two halves. This balance is perfection. And that perfection is composed of feminine inspiration, the idea of what could be. Then, the masculine is action or the manifestation of the inspiration. All is first birthed in the feminine. When we have balance, we have a divine marriage composed of both energetics.

The Energetic of the Divine Feminine

The energetic of the Divine Feminine is softness, darkness, womblike-safety; it is intimate and nurturing. It is receptivity, openness, depth, nutrition, and fertile ground. Hence, we see the earth relationship—Mother Nature. It can also be the abyss, the depth of the seas, or the cosmos. It is mysterious. Feel it, even though it is dark, and notice there is nothing to fear. Rest, float; notice also that there is nothing to do, no pressure, no stress. Recognize your nervous system recalibrating here. It is so sweetly blissful and rejuvenating. It feels like a restful night’s sleep, like being held. Here one has the permission to simply be. It is the absence of activity. It is the spinning yin-yang, the perfect balance. It is flowing like a river, twirling like the wind, anchored like the mountains, and shining like the stars. Since it is feminine, her shape might be described as round, curvy, swimming like an otter, gentle like a deer, hibernating like a bear, trusting like a duckling, delicate like a butterfly.


Yes, she is all that, and she kicks ass too! However the history that led to knowing how to be the successful tough diva was long and arduous. Warrioresses for freedom led the way.

Prior to the feminist movement and during the time of religious Reformation, women who remembered earth medicine such as herbalism or who could read the stars and listen to the animals were considered heretics and witches who practiced magic. The numbers of women tortured and executed during the Medieval and Spanish Inquisitions is a horrendous fact of history. However, following that, the extraordinary evolution of women looks like this: Late 1800s – Suffrage; 1920 – the 19th amendment, which gave women the right to vote, own property and not be property; the world wars which required women to be in charge on the home front; and the powerful female leaders of the 60’s and 70’s extended the ideas of Equal Rights to women as along with minorities.

By the 1980’s women could be independently employed, working nine to five… even if they were “barely making a living.” More and more women were finding their voice. Today, many powerful women continue to step forward to level the playing field.

The feminist movement propelled women out of oppression and into the light. This was very powerful and necessary. Women found liberation in doing what they needed to do to be just like men—educated, competitive, business oriented, providers and protectors. Women have been bringing home the bacon and frying it up in a pan for decades.

The thing is, feminism is not the feminine energetic; it is the masculine energetic.

The Divine Feminine is really not a new idea… “It has always been there.”

Goddess Archetypes

Goddess archetypes help us understand and remember what the feminine Energetic looks and feels like. Quan Yin illustrates compassion as a feminine quality. She is an example of presencing oneself in peacefulness and radiating it. The Venus of Willendorf, of Northern Europe, represents the Earth Mother. She is the goddess of creativity, fertility and motherhood. Similarly, Pachamama or World Mother is the sacred Goddess of harvest and planting for the people of the Andes Mountains. She is revered as the Creatrix of all there is. The Incan honor the Pachamama in their very walk through life; they are present with the mother. In the Greek Pantheon, there are many archetypes representing different aspects of the Divine Feminine. Hera, for example, is the Goddess of Marriage. She likes to be a partner in her creative projects whether it is the vision of raising a family or partnering in business. Another archetype of ancient Greece is Aphrodite. She is the goddess of Love and Beauty. The sexuality of Aphrodite is open and receptive and attractive as well as self-honoring; she is never the victim and never the guilty of her sexuality. All these are examples of the Feminine energetic, notice how powerful they are in a way that is not masculine.

Goddess in Poetry and Art

The Divine Feminine is here; she always has been. Because of our collective amnesia, we have not been seeing her consciously yet here she is, Beauty in words. For example, we see her in beloved poetry of Emily Dickenson, Robert Frost, Walt Whitman and others.

From Emily Dickenson’s Psalm of the Day (the first 3 stanzas):

A something in a summer’s day, As slow her flambeaux burn away, Which solemnizes me.
A something in a summer’s noon, — An azure depth, a wordless tune, Transcending ecstasy.
And still within a summer’s night A something so transporting bright, I clap my hands to see;
Poets move us and touch our hearts with their description of nature, emotion and mysticism.

We also see the Divine Feminine in the great cathedrals across Europe and the Americas. She is there in the structures of the buildings, particularly the domes. She is illuminated as the glorious stained glass mandalas of the Notre Dame and others. We love her as the Black Madonna, and all the Virgin Mary and Mary Magdalene sculptures and icons. These are representations of the Goddess. Yes they are! Amnesia or not, she is with us, just look around! In Christianity, we have the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Stemming further back to Hebrew, spirit translates to word Ruah. In Aramaic, the meaning of the word Shekinah is presence. They both are feminine words and imply the Holy Spirit is the feminine aspect of the Trinity. This presence or spirit is represented as a dove, which has always been a symbol of the goddess and femininity. You see the dove in churches, temples and cathedrals.


Yet, she has been subdued in the greater religions of the recent several thousand years. She has been reduced and minimized so that the masculine aspect of god as evidenced in the patriarchal paradigm could rise in power and manifest and grow and evolve. The patriarchy has woven into the other constructs of society, and this energetic has gone greatly out of balance. This imbalance has been creating a push that goes against the health and wellness of the body of the goddess, the Earth. And Earth is not separate from all the nature upon it, including the human race. So as the patriarchy—which has aspects that are immature—erupts and has temper tantrums on Wall Street, on fear-based religious fronts, on political and economic fronts, and in war, the very existence of humanity becomes threatened. It is the masculine energetic to be a protector. However, protecting what is considered one’s own and taking from the planet and from other peoples has devolved. A dualistic me-versus-you mentality creates fear and greed and drives the masculine energetic out of balance. It’s outdated and has resulted in the rape, destruction and contamination of the atmosphere, water and land. This is the masculine out of balance.

It is obvious humanity has reached a pinnacle now. I realize many women and men are remembering. Some beloveds of the patriarchy are re-cog-nizing and remembering the balance of the Divine Feminine and are subtly folding it into religious and spiritual acumen. It is exciting to see the amnesia lessen its hold. When the activity of the masculine is in alignment with this awaking, the results can be beautiful, sustainable and just.

Just for the record, it does not matter whether one is a man or woman; both carry the aspects off the masculine and feminine energetics.

However, women—the ones emanating femininity in form—are and have been feeling this draw, this impulse to remember for many years. Silently and not so silently, some of us have been in alignment with the Divine Feminine. As we honor the divinity of femininity we move to balance, heal, and repair from a morally, emotionally and spiritually mature standpoint. We remember the goddess, and we remember being priestesses in the temple. We are beginning to walk as priestesses again.

The Divine Feminine is here; she always has been. Click to Tweet


Just as the ancient Greeks recognize the Christos-Sophia symbol, the god/goddess, we can too. Remembering the etymology is some really interesting stuff. Sophia translates to Wisdom; simply being in this place of knowing is the divine feminine, Sophia. This is the all-knowing aspect or Omniscience. Christos translates to the anointed one, and to anoint is action, holy right-action, the masculine energetic. This is the all-powerful aspect or Omnipotence. By whom or what has Christos, the divine masculine, been anointed? Well, Sophia of course! He thereby anoints; the anointment is Sophia, the great wisdom. This is the true meaning of Faith. Jesus the Christ, known as the anointed one, is an exemplar. From Mark 10:52, “And Jesus said unto him, Go thy way; thy faith hath made thee whole. And immediately he received his sight, and followed Jesus in the way.”

Remembering and coming out of the amnesia are necessary and must happen quickly for the sustainability of our children. Outwardly, and regardless of gender, that remembering and maturity in consciousness recognizes all things everywhere are of one divine nature, God/Goddess in harmonious balance. The Christos-Sophia together create the all-present aspect, Omnipresence. The Great I Am is everywhere and in all things. There is no group or institution more important than another, no one being more important than another, and no ideology correct or incorrect. It embraces all, has great compassion, and immense ability to forgive. It is creative and intelligent and able to defy negativity with—guess what—love.

Indeed, Love orienting and activating from a place of emotionally/spiritually maturing Love or Wisdom (Sophia) is immensely powerful. It is the opposite of fear. I believe Love is a universal force far greater than fear and it is just waiting for us to be more fully aligned.



Duality is defined as the quality or condition of having two parts. The opposite of duality is non duality or oneness and the I Am is the all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-present essence of oneness.

Oneness infers no separation. Everything, including every one of us, is connected. We are connected by virtue of our interrelatedness just like all the plants and animals in the rainforest are connected, interrelated and interdependent. Oneness includes being connected to that which is seen and unseen, with energies, and with all that is beyond the three dimensional world. With oneness comes the comfort of feeling in-sync, not alone, tapped in, and intended. It is simply a good feeling.


So, how is duality part of our reality? Simply put, we live in a world of physicality, right? This experience of being in physical form creates the phenomenon of duality. Life and duality start when we receive our first breath, when we inhale and exhale. We experience day and night (light and dark). We nourish ourselves with food and drink as we receive the nutrition and release what we do not need. W e experience emotions and their opposites such as happiness and sadness or love and hate. We perceive good and bad; winning and losing; success and failure; male and female; yin and yang. We have jobs and responsibilities, and then we transition out with our last breath. Even life is contrasted by death.

We live a dualistic experience

We live a dualistic experience as human beings.In this dimension, we have contrast; in fact, we need contrast to have experiences. We wouldn’t inhale if we didn’t exhale. We wouldn’t hear music unless it was paired with quiet.

We wouldn’t

We wouldn’t see art unless it was hung on a blank or contrasting background. We wouldn’t know happiness without sadness. We have our duality in order to experience our experiences.


Another way of considering duality is recognizing it as a continuum. In other words, we have light and the absence of light and everything in between. We have health and not as much health. We have wealth and not as much wealth. We always have the choice to opt into the vibration of what it feels like to have health, wealth, etc., even when we are not experiencing what our ego or causal mind would like to believe is health or wealth.

This brings us to determinism. I believe the universe is all-powerful, and all-knowing. Therefore, is everything predetermined? Is it already written?
Already written-what does that mean? How can this be?


I am seriously perplexed here in the 3-D. There is oneness, some say, yet I am not you and you are not me. And why do I sound like Dr. Seuss?

I am an individual expression of human-ness. It feels like I am the center of my own universe. I can empathize and see from the point of view of another person’s shoes, yet I still see from my perspective for the most part. I realize I choose my daily activities, and I create. I am happiest when I am creating, co-creating, collaborating, and freely expressing. I am in bliss when I am being my truest, most authentic, and uninhibited me. I feel like I am having my way with all the goings-on in my life; however, I feel and I know that the universe or all that is already designed is having its way with me. I remember I have been birthed from the universe itself and it is as if I play out all my life’s events that are already planned. This raises the question of free will vs. fate.

But going back to our original topic, how is it that there is oneness and duality in our experience?
Maybe the answer to what we experience isn’t one or the other. Maybe it is both. It is a paradox after paradox, no doubt.


The knowing of what is having its way with me comes from my heart, not my intellect. It is faith. This intelligence of deep knowing is something I know we all have and when we exercise the muscles of listening to it, attending to it, and grounding it into the 3-D as part of this dualistic experience, we do have inner knowing, clarity, and an understanding of our life’s purpose.

We live a dualistic experience as human beings.


As discussed earlier, we have the contrast in order to experience. We have the continuum. I remember when I realized that all contrasting ideas could be seen as different sides of the same coin. I was working out the energy of leading;and in doing so, I became clear on the understanding of following. I realized that leading is directly related to my ability to follow my own inner guidance. It is to be in the great flow of allowing, and to be in faith.

This following is done with discipline and obedience to my being-ness, to the I AM that is expressing through and as me.

Does the same coin analogy apply to fate and free will? I believe it can be thought of this way. When we activate freely of our own will in alignment with the I Am all the while listening to the wisdom of the heart, we are in alignment with Fate, that divine design that is always in play. This is also possibly the truth of duality. Duality and non-duality (oneness) are different sides of the same coin. We get to explore and bliss-out right here in the 3-D with all its contrasts, dualities, and realizations that in the big picture and as the embodiment of the light of the I AM, we are all connected to everyone and everything n’ always.

We are all connected to everyone and everything n’ always.

A Prayer of Oneness

As I close my eyes and move into what IS, I know the One I call the I AM, The Universe, Great Spirit, or God is ever-present. It is all-knowing, all-powerful, and infinite. I know this I Am presence is One with all there is. It is Perfection, Harmony, Tempo, Grace and Love. In fact, I know Love is another name for the infinite. I realize and know that I, the one known as Christine, am one with the One, and I am expressing here in this dualistic three-dimensional experience as a being created of divine Love. And I know this for you, the ones reading these words as well as all the ones not reading these words. I know it for all beings, and for all the ways the Universe expresses. This brings me to the deep inner knowing and remembering of my/our origin. We are of the Earth, and before that, the substance that makes up our physicality was simply stardust. I know all physicality is condensed energy or slow moving light. How cool is that! This is a realization I am so grateful for. I am in Joy to know that my physicality as well as yours and all that is here in the 3-D is embodied light. I am uplifted with great-Full-ness and sweet openness in the gratitude of this knowledge. As I write this Oneness prayer, releasing it into word, I deliver it to the place it came from, to the One itself. Here it is received and upon this reception it is amplified and activated into Isness.